I wrote this post while on a recent family vacation. I hope it helps you like the lessons have helped me! - Jen
I was excited to take a walk on the beach this morning. I was looking forward to my husband or one of my kids going with me, but I ended up going alone. I was tempted to feel bad about it because it was not what I had planned out in my mind. I chose not to allow any drama stories to play out in my head. Instead I decided I would walk for an hour. The wind was blowing against me. It was not an easy walk. I was determined to achieve my goal, and I am so glad that I did. I learned so many things along my way!
#1 - Being alone on my walk did not mean I was alone.
I was able to quiet my mind, and I felt it open up to all kinds of insights and answers that I know came directly from Heaven. There were people along the way smiling and greeting me with good mornings; there were also people walking the opposite direction, telling me the way back is easier. I couldn't help but realize that life is the same. We are all on our own paths, even within marriage and family. I sometimes get caught up in the lie that if my husband & I are not on the same page at the same moment, that we are not connected or going in the same direction. That is so far from the truth. We are not the same person. His idea of an early morning beach walk is different than mine. That's all - just different. He wanted time to sleep in and wake up slowly. I saw him headed out on his walk as I was finishing mine. He had his earphones in and was looking forward to listening to a new book. In that moment, I could see that what was relaxing for him was different than what was relaxing for me. We were both on the path, just experiencing it differently. I thought about my children and the paths that they are on. I know for sure that they would not have wanted to go for an hour walk. If they had come because I made them, the experience would have been miserable for them and for me. It would not have brought us closer or created fond memories. I became more aware of how I can give the gift of allowing others to choose their own way to experience their path. Letting go of the expectation that things need to be a certain way in our relationships is a true gift to others. Letting go of the lie and head talk that the people in our lives don't love us, accept us or value us allows us to stay connected to our personal power. If others choose a different way to be on the path, and if you can gift them the space and respect that you would want, then it is a true gift to them and you!
#2 - The wind blows against us sometimes, but doesn't have to stop us.
I'm not going to lie. The wind was strong, and I had thoughts of turning back several times. I did not allow my mind to come up with justifications to quit. I focused on everything I LOVED about being on that walk! The sound of the ocean, the warmth of the sun on my face, the cool breeze, the beautiful sky, friendly faces along the way, unique shells to look at, and clarity of thought. I thought about my business and how it often feels the same. I am on this amazing walk of building a business and there are times when I feel like moving forward is like walking against the wind. It is not impossible, but it takes mental commitment to keep going and not let the excuses slow me down or cause me to quit moving ahead. I can focus on all the things I enjoy about my business - my clients and being a part of their soul transformation, developing my gifts and talents, working with an amazing assistant that makes my path easier and smoother, a team that supports me and wants to work with me to make the world a better place, and all of the amazing opportunities that show up that confirm to me over and over that I truly am on the right path for me. This can also be applied to our relationships. How often do we hear of couples splitting up because the love ran out, or one was committed and the other wasn't, or it wasn't the fairy tale they dreamed of? The truth is that we all bring baggage to our relationships - every relationship. The wind blows on our relationships as we fall back into childhood pain, fear of failure or rejection, fear that we can't make it work because our parents or grandparents or close friends didn't. Our pain bounces off of others and it feels like walking against the wind. You can choose how to show up in your marriage, your friendships, your business relationships, with your children, parents, and siblings. There is no such thing as a perfect relationship. The winds come, but you choose how you show up. You choose what you see, your commitment, and to forgive or not forgive. When I am at the beach it really calms me. That peace and calm empowers me. It is easy to feel it and I notice that the more peaceful and calm I am inside, the better my relationships become, the more successful my business is, and I am so much happier with my life. I choose to focus on that peace.
#3 - We find what we're searching for.
As I headed back to the condo, I remembered a trip that our family took years ago to the Oregon Coast. My mom happened to go on that trip with us, and I remembered how she was in search of heart shaped rocks. Our children were young and they loved helping her search for and find these special rocks. It brought her so much joy and we all loved contributing to her joy by helping her. I had the thought that I had never found any other heart shaped treasures like that on any other trips I've been on throughout the years. I wondered if she was just better at finding than I was. Then, the thought came to me so clearly: I wasn't searching for it. I decided to put the law of abundance to a unique test. I just put it out there that I wanted to find something heart shaped. I let go of the first negative thought that came to my mind: there's no such thing as a heart shaped shell! I was reminded how QUICKLY those thoughts of doubt come to the surface when we decide we want something! I quickly dismissed the negative thought, and kept telling myself I was going to find something heart shaped. THEN, I started LOOKING. I had to slow my walking pace down and pay attention. Wow - I started seeing so much more beauty as I slowed down! Can you imagine my surprise and delight that within a few short minutes of looking for what I wanted, I FOUND IT? I found a heart shaped sand dollar! It was there; I just had to look for it, see it, and pick it up! I thought about how many times I have said I want something, but then don't bother to look! This was my little, yet powerful sign from heaven that what I want is available to me...I don't even have to wait very long! I just have to know what I want, slow down, look for it, and SEE it and pick it up!
The Power of Starting with You
February 22, 2017
What Bali taught me about being in the flow of life